Silence for Boston

I'm not sure if you noticed that I had stopped doing Tuesday's Tunes.  I've gone through phases on my blog where I have a specific theme for a specific day.  I don't hold to it 100%, but often it gives me guidance for what to post.  I had stopped doing it recently because I had been frequently running with my running partner and I never listen to music when with her.  We pretty much talk non stop the whole time, so what's the point of music.

Unless you live under a complete rock, runner or not, I'm sure you've heard about the bombings at Boston yesterday.  Normally I don't pay too much attention to media when bad/negative things happen.  Actually I don't pay much attention to media at all unless it involves running, but even then I can only take in so much.  I miss media happenings ALL the time.  I have my own little world to worry about, I can't track every thing that happens to everyone.  Running or not.  Regardless of the situation I'm not much of media person, especially when it's tragic.  I'm a super emotional, get attached person.  The news is hard and rough for me to process.  I will sit there and just bawl, even if the events have nothing to do with me or my life.

I headed out for a run yesterday about mid afternoon.  I always run with my phone, but don't normally attend to texts or phone calls.  It can wait!  For awhile it was a really great run.  What made it so great was the rain.  It wasn't raining when I started, but picked up about half way through.  I was happier than a pig in mud with the 60 degree temps and warm rain coming down.  Even as it pelted me in the face it felt so wonderfully awesome!  I know I had a lot on my mind as I ran, I'm always full of prayers, thoughts, ideas, etc.  I know I was dreaming of Boston.  Thinking about it, hoping & planning to be there next year (or the near future).  After having watched the elite race that morning and I was all excited about it, it helped fuel my passion for wanting to run what is considered the greatest race of all.

I noticed that I had been receiving several texts during my run.  I still ignored them.  Then I got a phone call.  Ignore.  (By ignore I mean, I hear my ringtone for either a text or call and just let it ring.  I don't see who is calling or what they have to say, etc.  I just keep running)  Can this woman not run in peace & be left alone for just a teeny bit of her day?!?!?!  Finally after another phone call I gave in and answered my phone, who could possibly be calling and texting me SO much.  Turns out to be my husband.  Yes, I will admit I completely rolled my eyes.  He was calling to tell me about the Boston bombings.  I had a hard time processing what he was even trying to tell me.  Boston marathon + bombing do not make sense at all.  Maybe he was mistaken, heard the news wrong, etc.  I will still a mile from home so I hurried home and rushed into the house to turn on the t.v.  My mind was not only on the runners, but also the volunteers, & spectators.  While I knew of a lot of people running that day, I didn't know anyone very close or personally.  A childhood friend & neighbor who lives in Boston and said she was going to watch the race was the closest person that kept coming to mind about who was there and could possibly be affected.  While she reported that she was only a few blocks away when the bombs went off and had at one point been much closer to the location of the first bomb, she is OK!  Thank goodness for Facebook to check on these things quickly.  Cindy, I am SO GLAD you are ok!!  There are, of course, many other stories.  A tough chik  team mate had slowed down the last half of her marathon.  She was right down the street when the bombs went off.  If she had been a minute faster she would have been much closer or at the spot of the bombs.  I know the list and stories are endless.

While I typically steer clear of media I was glued to the t.v.  I cried, I grieved, I got mad, I felt crushed, I felt personally attacked.  The feelings are endless.  My kids were coming home from school wondering what was going on.  They even seemed puzzled that I was upset.  It's not like I was there.  I had to explain that it still affects me, it affect all of the running community.  Later in the evening I started to feel sick.  I ended up staying in bed most of the night.  It all literally made me ill.

The immediate response from the rest of the running community is what can we do?  Many are running in race shirts today.  Wearing yellow & blue.  Running a mile of silence.  Running in the shape of B through their town.  Virtual runs are being formed.    The list goes on and on.  You know we will not stand silent to these attacks.  For most it fuels the fire.  We will still run.  We will not hide in fear.  We will still hope and dream of Boston, even if we never qualify.  The spirit and community of running is strong and fierce!

This morning I set out on a 4 mile run in the dark streets of my town.  I was not with my running partner.  I was alone.  The perfect reason for some music to keep me company or distract, maybe comfort me.  Instead I ran in silence.  4 miles of silence for Boston and the tragic events that unfolded yesterday.  It actually opened a whole bag of emotions for me as I prayed and thought through many things in my life right now, even things having nothing to do with Boston or running.  I needed it to help me process and heal through this all.  Between that, not watching the tv/news and blogging about it I plan to keep my chin up and keep on running.