Per usual, I have so much to blog about. What I really want to blog about, I don't want to. Wait, does that make sense? I want to write this big beautiful post about my friend Joy, who lost her battle to cancer last night. However, I know that if I "go there" I will sit here bawling. I have already bawled bucket loads. I'm honestly cried out at this time.
So I went to the Y this morning & taught my usual cardio class at 6 a.m. I wasn't feeling it too much, but got through the motions ok. I did have SOME fun. I introduced a bunch of Christmas music & it was hard to not smile & have fun. It was also hard to not think about Joy and hold back some tears. Luckily getting all sweaty helped mask any tears that fell.
Then I went back to the Y after I got the kids to school. I had me a nice good run on the treadmill. I don't know the last time I ran on a treadmill. Sometime eariler this year? Said subject is in the works for it's own post. I knew I needed to take all this emotion and grief and just hammer it out on the machine. I selected a treadmill in front of a tv that sported a channel that I like. Not sure why, I didn't watch the tv at all. I blared my music, losing myself to its sounds, rhythms & lyrics. And I ran fast & hard. Perhaps faster & harder than I have in months. I also forgot my water bottle. I didn't care. I wanted to be thirsty. I wanted to hurt. I wanted this to be one bada** run. After all, if my friend could fight cancer, I can certainly endure an intense 3.5 mile run. Stupid cancer....take that 3.5 miles & SHOVE IT! *ptttttttth*
I promise to give you a nice post on my beautiful friend Joy. For now, I leave you with a photo of us together. She was such a good friend and I will miss her.